The hardest thing, and the best thing. Ill cherish and thank you for the gift of time and joy we shared. Thanks for stopping by! Thanks for reading and for voting up! Mum's discharge from the hospital was delayed by a day due to transport issues. It must have hurt you terribly. She doesnt always remember to drink or have a meal We too are one. He was the type to meet and greet other residents. Common Mistakes: the word "i" should be capitalized, "u" is not a word, and "im" is spelled "I'm" or "I am". For someone else Paula from The Midwest, USA on November 17, 2011: Habee, your poem struck a chord with me. It perfectly captures the love a mother has for a daughter, even if she can no longer express it. Mum was in the Angling Times for catching a 26lb 7oz carp and could fish along with some of the best of them. If I occasionally lose track of what we're talking about. For I will still remember But, like many care partners, I felt I had no choice. I said "Hi Dad!" Perhaps both of those aspects were part of "the plan." stool, my longing. Watching her deteriorate over a course of many years broke my mom's heart. Thank you for taking the time to read my story and poem. dont sleep well at night I hate you.You have robbed me of my mother.You have robbed a husband of his wife.No one can stop you.You never give back. Be seen, She doesn't even know who she is. I miss her cooking, her curiosity, her crazed kitchen cleaning. */, This blog is a platform for my advocacy for positive tools, techniques and strategies, and against the inappropriate use of antipsychotic drugs in dementia care. Dementia By Debbie Bell Published by Family Friend Poems December 2020 with permission of the Author. This is simply beautiful thank you Joann and Susan. You're my biggest inspiration. Demas W Jasper from Today's America and The World Beyond on November 14, 2011: Two things to ponder: my cousin's wife had Alzheimers and he commented that taking her to Disneyland was always a treat because for her it was brand new each time; and, their son died as a successful, just-retired adult, from rapid melanoma. I lost my dad just over a week ago with advanced dementia suffered over a number of years. Likewise, the two dads family is actually one biological mom (who is being ignored) + one biological dad + one step-dad. I was there when she died. I saw him slowly degenerate. More than anything Julie, I loved hearing from your life, the life in your Mum and yes she does look like a model in that picture and full of fun in the other. Hi Mary Ann, I am so sorry that you are going through the long goodby with your Mom. This I know. How very much you cared. (LogOut/ Thank you for reading my story and poem. Use the unsubscribe link in those emails to opt out at any time. I was very fortunate to have a mom like i had and i will never forget her. More than anything your story and Poem especially is loaded with love and that's what will keep you going. her elbow bends. Melissa, sorry about your grandmother. I am so sorry to hear this. Thank you for that, De Greek. someone that they love I have been adding lines to this poem for a number of months now. I wrote this poem at that time. My mother taught to read before I started school and coached me through winning spelling contests. Bless them all for their patience and loving kindness. Julie's mum, Eileen, was living well with dementia in her assisted living property before the pandemic. May we find a cure for this horrible disease. for mothers and fathers Shewould dance along with the best of them, and always the last to go to bed! Anglnwu, thank you. November 23, 2017 My Alzheimer's Story. Here at Shared we are putting emphasis on accuracy. Choice of 5 designs. Voted it UP, etc. Other changes are taking place slowly. My dad was always one step ahead of the game. He wanted to be sure he and my mom had the care they needed without being a burden to their family. My parents were one month away from their 60 years, too. Yes, the dementia changed my Mom to someone I didnt recognize at times, but my love for her never changed. At another, 200 kms away. Thank you for sharing all and I'm sending it on to my Sister, Brothers and friend in Hartlepool who's Mum went into a home in February. His Children is a winner of the Benjamin Franklin Publishing Award and finalist for the Independent Publisher Book Awards. This poem is very well done. Alzheimers impacts everyone. All poetry on this site is written by Susan Noyes Anderson. 3) millions more children are raised by siblings or themselves because both their parents are not present for whatever reason I enjoy visiting there, because we always have laughs and fun and it is wonderful to see everyone's smiles and to join in with their laughter. Julie shares her story, and 'My Poem to Dementia'. My siblings and I did not live in our hometown of Butte, Montana so we were not available to help out in any way of caring for my mom. Thanks for writing this. Story, it was a tough time. X. You never give back. Thank you for writing it. I wish this ongoing nightmare wasnt real, What have you done with my mum dementia Please be sure to retain exact formatting and line breaks. The daughter tricks her mother into moving in . HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. my 90 year old mother has macular degeneration and now is in the later stages of alzheimers. I had two mothers two mothers I claim, Then we held a graveside service later that day at Sealy Cemetery in Sealy, Texas. Copyright 2022 A Place for Mom, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Tough times, eh? small wave from The carers were my sister's friends and they were wonderful. She was the kindest, most altruistic person I have ever known. dementia caregivers: a poem. This is the worst kind of suffering that a person and family could go through, never knowing from one minute to the next what you are, where,or who you are. What a beautiful poem. Nurses told us that some go back to their childhood and some act like they're five. Change), You are commenting using your Facebook account. which may involve poo! COVID is making the possibility of seeing him again unlikely. Julie's mum, Eileen, was living well with dementia in her assisted living property before the pandemic. So the two moms family is actually one biological dad (who is being ignored) +1 biological mom and 1 step-mom. Do you ever go to the lodge? I twist my hands in Why am I here Your poetry is amazing; and the truth of it is astounding. You have robbed me of my mother. Throughout this war people have lived in a time when medicine was not very developed, and frequently children fell upon bad circumstances because of their situation. To My Mother by John Gilson If I were granted one wish today, and I knew it would come true; I'd ask the Lord for a little time, to speak alone with you. You have done an absolutely beautiful work of art describing the devastation and "long goodbye"of Alzheimer's. Of the mum who would race us all around the block | Trending, Are you tired of playing casino games for fun and not seeing any real money wins? Vanne, I was so hoping you'd see this! Why you for this journey?I dont know.I miss you so.I pray you will reach your destination,Soon. When she repeats things over and over again I left and visited Canada for 3 months, but on my return, friends told me that he should consult a doctor. like frogs in a saucepan And if my own children should come to a day, She died a few months before her 90th birthday. Me, blue leather sofa. It's great to hear from you. What have you done with my mum dementia What makes Family Friend Poems collection of published poems special? I hate you. Mum was officially diagnosed with Alzheimers disease / mixed dementia probably two or three years ago, although she showed signs of this when Dad was alive. I cry every time I remember my daughter's ordeal. She doesnt always remember her grandchildrens names These poems are both beautiful and unfailingly honest, addressing with humor and charity the difficulties of caring for a parent with this disease. Just know in your heart that the most important thing for me is to be with you. Sometimes shed be perfectly lucid, and then in an instant, she might be cursing, which shed never done before her affliction, or babbling nonsense about imagined jobs and the nursing staffs stealing her belongings. I found my grief and sadness was so deep it was almost like I was frozen. I no longer enjoy my frequent visits to mums It is so sad and difficult to see someone you love and care about go down this road. What have you done to me dementia Instead of when I enter I would hear hello my love, What have you done with my mum dementia How silly. You are on a journey.One that is taking you,To where you do not necessarily want to go.It is agonizing for us, who love you,To see you leave. a stranger dressed in the clothes of my mother. She, burgundy chair. | Did You Know I'll accept what has to be. Such creative words that directly speak of someones battle with this, as my grandmother had this as well. Holle Abee (author) from Georgia on November 16, 2011: Queen, you are exactly right in your description of Alzheimer's - it's a thief. Blessings, Debby. Voted up. But, like many care partners, I felt I had no choice. Soft hazel eyes, Good luck for the future and keep adding to your poem - so very honest and true. As if on strings, At times, the changes to Mum occur so rapidly, they can catch me by surprise. She suffered this dreaded disease for almost six years and passed away in 2010. Try to remember the times when you were little and I would read the same story night after night until you would fall asleep. The little things that changed you I know that if my grandmother was here today, she'd have the most comforting words for my mom. Were you touched by this poem? Mum has a great sense of humour, which we are lucky enough to have inherited. GOOD LUCK!! Get the Poem of the Day delivered right to your phone! Sometimes he would get lost. My grandmother had Alzheimer's, also. Thats beautiful and made me cry. but dive in the water Words have always been an important part of my life. Dear habeethis is so touching, so compelling and so real. It afflicts many of the elderly. We beat ourselves up as we never think its enough. Was so hard to accept, Published by Family Friend Poems July 2008 with permission of the author. 5) if you troll my blog again, I will delete your comment as spam. Mum lives inassisted living accommodation and was doing well up until the coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic. She loved it though. I was her strength all those years. My Mum too was a strong lady and worked across the road in a hosiery factory and popped back too to find us jumping down the stairs onto a mattress.